Sorry Picard, We'll have to make it so another day, cause I can't go, I owe my soul to the company store. I just got a contract gig washing dishes on a barge full of surly road engineers up in scenic Toba inlet, the middle of nowhere. My roommate got me the contact for the job as she has been scubbing said engineers toilets for the past 6 weeks, and I finally landed myself this most prestigious of occupations. But Charles, you may ask, why are you leaving your bagpiping lessons, awkward internets dates, and star trek convention behind for a job the even ape people of the outer Hebernies have mastered?
The answer is a disappointing, 'cold hard cash". See, if you do this job in civilization, where there are houses, people, and easy access to hard pumping pornographic magazines, you get a wage so low that you've never owned a new pair of shoes in your life, and you have to get at least 4 wipes for every sheet of toilet paper. But, if you do it odd long hours on a barge in the middle of nowhere, you have your summer vacation paid for in 2 weeks, and can celebrate the end of the long haul with tea at the Empress and orgy involving at least 10 paid professional massauers.
At least with no technology to distract me, except the wireless internet, I'll have plenty of time to keep this blog regularly updated...with stunning tales of dirty dishes, no less.
2 comments:
High fives! Really, people who clean up crap (after construction workers yet!!) deserve a wage of many grand a month. That's humble.
Clogged toilets, burly construction workers, wireless internet.
That's either a winning blog combination, or the recipe for the most disturbing pornographic movie ever.
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